When we are similar, but not the same, as another (whether that “other” takes the form of an individual person, a point of view or a full-blown community or movement) that similarity can take us on a journey of self-discovery; one which calls us to step in and play our unique part, which may be to say “enough” to those differences at some point. It’s a key part of the process of recognising our “I”-ness when we spot these subtle variations from our own theme and say “no thank you” to them; which is to live most closely as our divine self since this is exactly why Source came into living form – to better know itself from many angles. Your angle is unique to you and you are here to express that viewpoint through your actions and choices, honing that experience by saying “yes” and even “no” to situations that present themselves in each moment, remaining fluid and responsive, not dogmatic and habitual, which only slows you down to the point of hardly evolving at all. People can get so confused by that; they become so focussed upon “oneness” that they think, at some level, they have to stop expressing opinion or individuality and say yes to everything. To do so is to miss the point of being human where the most direct route to realising your highest aspect in form – as part of a collective – is to be yourself as closely and expertly as you can possibly be and this is so much more important than all those alliances and affiliations with which you may have cluttered-up your life along the way.
In other words, the occasional clear-out of some of the people and things that clutter-up our life is as essential as clearing out those cupboard of old stuff we don’t know why we keep any more…and it should be attended to as often as possible. Especially on social media, we form these knee-jerk attachments to individuals and ideas that we forget to re-evaluate further down the road and so we just leave them there, attached to our energy field for the longest time spans. Having a good clear-out has never been more important than at this time as we upward-spiral ourselves to a brand new reality faster than we would have ever thought was possible before.
We all know it before we embark on such a project: some of the supposed matches we have made with other expressions of energy (since that is what people and ideas are…) may look like they are familiar to us at first (like versions of ourselves mirrored back at us) but, scratch under the surface, and many of them aren’t at all. We may have formed these attachments years ago before we changed so unutterably that we’re simply not that person anymore; or it may be a case that this thing seemed more familiar than it really was because of something it seemed to represent to us when we first came across it. We tend to dive upon these familiarities when we see them, especially if we carry the burdensome belief that we are particularly unusual to the vast majority of other people or that we don’t really fit in. This makes us more desperate than ever to “find our tribe” and we can tend to imagine we see this tribe in all sorts of places where, really, what we are seeing reflected back is our own wishful thinking. So this person or entity expresses an idea or two and we think “ah, that’s me” and we follow them…and half a decade later, there they still are, in our morning newsfeed. We build whole structures such as communities and even close friendships around them (which is not to say that all of these have to go) and yet….long after this pivot-point truly resonates…we ignore the uncomfortable truth that this person or thing no longer speaks to the truth in our heart. In fact, we may notice how we find them jarring to our sensibilities. We know that, if we were to meet them for the first time right now, we would pass them right by and yet….still…there they are in our close circle of activity so we put up and shut up. This is careless living, at the energetic level; and it can’t help but have an impact on our lives. We even know this, if we are honest with ourselves, and yet we have learned to ignore the signs or feel bullied out of listening to this higher wisdom. Well, anyone who has read my posts for any length of time will know just what I think about bully energy and that it’s one of the themes I am here to help dissolve. Its days are truly numbered in the forthcoming paradigm of humanity and it can be given its marching orders just as soon as we say so…by choosing different, disengaging our energy from it.
In fact the feeling of familiarity that caught our eye in the first place can be the very thing that makes these affiliations so tricky since they allow this entity to get very close to our heart core and our daily routines; their mindsets and words slip under our wire until we almost believe they are are own and so we get drawn in. Even when we start noticing the resistance we have to them, the energy we give to examining and ruminating over this conundrum with ourselves and others (“why don’t I like the feelings around this person any more?”) only gives the misfit attachment even more energy in our life. If we are still giving our time and thoughts to this thing, we might as well give up the keys to the kingdom since they have us either way. Our own spiral of spinning energy can nose dive whenever we see them pop up in our notifications or hear their name; and so we are still being siphoned of our energy, knowingly or otherwise….but only we give them this amount of our energy, through our attachment. Its like the battery drain that occurs when one domineering electrical device is unwittingly placed close to another and suddenly there is no power to switch our gizmo on in the morning; well, people and ideas can be like that to us too, draining us away so subtly we hardly notice it taking place and yet it happens, if we let it.
The key is to notice those pieces of communication that leave us – repeatedly – feeling “off” and to take the necessary action to clear them out of our personal space. That’s not to say we have to clear out people who deliver occasional bad news or have a rant about something, we all have those moments…but when it consistently happens, especially dressed up as spiritual wisdom…it may well be time to move them on. By turning that blind eye rather than dealing with the situation, we passively give the nod to whatever energy this thing is doling out and we send misleading messages to others who may value our example and remain in, say, a community for fear that they are alone in wanting to leave. By passively remaining there, saying or doing nothing, we seem to give encouragement or approval to this entity and this can be so misleading when it comes to the signals we send out to those who value our viewpoint (and this is where we are undeniably connected to others in ways that make a difference). Its true, many people seek a sense of security and validation through the numbers of others with whom they are associated – its why they like to form so many groups – and this inevitably means that whole communities are built upon no one daring to say anything contrary (or leave) in case they are suddenly the odd one out or missing something “important”. Because of our convoluted history, fear of marginalisation runs deep through the cellular memory of humanity and this fear superglues people to whole mindsets they no longer share or feel comfortable with. Our die-hard habit is to attach to something…even if we are really not that sure about it…to safeguard our own survival but those times have now ended and we need to cultivate the nerve to disengage with what no longer feels resonant with who we are at our core and be that leading example of someone who lives their truth through all of their actions, even (perhaps especially) the unspoken ones. There’s no need to engage in conflict or get all judgemental about anything or anyone you don’t agree with; you can vote with your feet – which is really your energy (which is where it is all happening anyway).
Yes, the time has come to be done with that “insurance policy” reason for being attached to anything; its time to take the personal steps that walk us to our own truth and away from what no longer feels resonant…and if we don’t know what that means, our feelings will tell us. When I encounter behaviour that feels “off” to me, I experience a whole body reaction that seems to emanate from my solar plexus like a knot in the stomach followed by a wave of deeply uncomfortable sensations..maybe heat, prickles, shaking, weakness. It doesn’t last long but its strong enough for me to take it seriously so I bless the nature of the extreme alarm-system I have running that, once upon a time, I know I kept suppressed so hard that it had to use other, more pervasive and long-lasting (health affecting!), means of gaining my attention. These days, I give this early warning system my ear and I follow through with my actions whenever the necessity arises, knowing I owe this to myself above all things and that this is how I build the self-trust that allows me to thrive, come what may. You could call it “integrity” and its like a spinal column of strength that sees me through anything, now I allow it to be there. Its amazing how the body calms down AND becomes more responsive, in ways that support you, when you offer it this degree of respect. A woman reaching her middle years will find she has these body-skills waiting for her to hone in order to best support herself through the rest of her life, as her wisdom allows. Many women suppress the first signs of this occurring, reading the “symptoms” as though their health is crashing all around them but really they are stepping into their power-years, if they are prepared to listen to all the abundant clues.
So, if I need to say “thanks but no thanks” to an entity or person; that’s what I do then I let it go to the four winds with no regrets, nothing left to even have to forgive (which is a Sixth Wave concept that just attaches more energy to the very thing you are letting go of). Ruminating upon what just happened (analysing or discussing it) afterwards is only to continue giving it more energy; so, without judgement, I let it go…I mean COMPLETELY go; even thanking it for being the “dark angel” catalyst that it was in my life (until its expiry date came up). Its a mindset we can spin out into all aspects of our life; areas such as consumer choices, family belief systems, office politics and our very lifestyle….if these no longer fit, let them go, without the post-mortem. For the record, we are so over needing gurus to show us how to find our way; we are our own gurus now and all the guidance we will ever need to help steer our lives is encompassed by the north star shining inside our own heart.
By the way, cutting ties when called for isn’t a case of even more “separation mentality”, as so many people seem to fear (which is one of those examples of a popular, if over-used, spiritual idea turned back in on itself, leading to inertia and disempowerment). Rather, its a case of getting MUCH closer to the truth of who we are as an individual…which has the knock-on effect of cleaning up the intention of the whole of humanity, which can only bring us all closer together as we show our true colours even more brightly than ever. All those most innocuous-seeming tendrils of allegiance fuelled by fear and self-interest, which are really the parasitical blight to our upward growth, can fall away to allow unfettered expansion to occur. When we give our energy to what “isn’t us” we straightjacket and dilute all that we truly are and this stalls or even crashes our progression towards a whole new level of experience.
When we throw ourselves out across such a wide area, energetically, we become like the spider sat at the centre of the most ambitious spiders web; which lacks in practicality what it gains in kudos for being so immense (but since when has the size of its web been more important to the spider than where she wisely chooses to place it; this has been the distortion of the recent paradigm, which is all about “more” and “bigger”). The spider is now registering so many vibrations from so many far corners of her web that she hardly know which signal is the one she wants to be listening to for her sustenance so she ends up bewildered, exhausted from running here and there checking all these calls for her attention and…in the end…utterly depleted. I see this whenever I notice people with hundreds if not thousands of connections on Facebook, like they are in some sort of competition to have the most “friends”; but what is the point of this when you are no longer noticing the conversations that are most important to you and are drowned out by announcements that bring your energy field crashing down? I have a rule of thumb…no more than 70 connections (and that still feels too many…) and, when I havent had a positive interaction with someone for more than 6 months, I reconsider whether to be attached to them at all. Make no mistake….all these things we connect ourselves to (whether “live” with interaction or not) hold a distinct electrical charge and are an attachment of sorts so we owe it to ourselves to be mindful about whether we actually want them in our field.
Politeness can also keep these attachments going for far longer than they were ever meant to be there…as can business interest (staying connected to lots of people in case they help fuel your income) or sheer complacency. All of these things can be detrimental to keeping your own tone as crystal clear (and truly representative of YOU) as it can be; for yourself and for others to “hear”. The long-running status quo we allow to remain in place can make our energy field stodgy and resistant to wonderful new possibilities coming in…and we barely notice this until, suddenly, something jolts us to our feet and we notice what we have been putting up with for the longest time. These non-matching voltages plugged into our own are often invisible to the eye and yet they can be straining our circuit or even on the verge of blowing our fuseboard. The very fact of being connected can hold us back from achieving our potential trajectory since we all know how an inch or two of distortion at ground level can take us completely off course once we reach for the sky. Its amazing how, once you clear your field of what no longer matches, you can feel your energy flame flicker up inside and, all of a sudden, you are attracting better situations, more resonant connections, good-vibe interactions left and right, without any effort at all. This is because you just made room in your field for fresh new encounters that can now hear your pristine clarion call summoning them into your experience!
I’ve focused a lot on social media but all the same things apply in our daily lives, including our work situations. We sometimes have people in those fields of operation that we “put up with” without really wanting to; and these can either be like the heavy old piece of furniture that we no longer like sat right in the middle of our “room” or like an insidious vapour that gets into all the nooks and crannies of our being, making us feel toxic. Either way, by not dealing with them…or at least setting firm boundaries of what is acceptable (or not) when we are with them…we nail ourselves to their reality and its like unwanted ballast hanging off our balloon when we want to take off. Whether in virtual or “real” life, taking charge of these situations can elicit some remarkable shifts that we register suddenly in our bodies. I’ve heard people describe how physical pains or blockages spontaneously cleared when they took these situations in hand; I have a friend who made such a move and her blocked sinuses disappeared in the very same moment. Whilst this might sound bizarre or too trivial to take seriously, one thing I have come to appreciate is how the body never lies. Dr Christiane Northup often talks about how the painful breast cyst she was about to have removed suddenly healed when she dealt with an emotional blockage around a dysfunctional relationship she had allowed to perpetuate. One part of the body that can often register blockage or pain when we avoid taking charge of this portion of our life can be the throat chakra since we are, quite literally, failing to speak our truth when we allow other energies attached to our field to speak for us as though by proxy.
Even if these characters or entities in our lives do not seem all that formidable by themselves, when we are attached to many multiples of such people and their viewpoints that are out of alignment with who we truly are, this can have a compounding effect and….like any quantum reality…will start to permeate our physical reality through the consistency of its vibration. In other words, what starts out as complacency around an invisible choicepoint (doing nothing about something that requires our attention) can turn into the hard fabric of our life circumstances. By choosing (and expressing) or OWN unique vibration through all our attachments and interactions, we take back our power and the reins of our life in a way that is so on-key with the current times, which are geared for the kind of super-rapid evolution that occurs on the back of integrity and empowered selfhood, without all the heavy baggage of other people’s belief systems. As ever, I assert that the area of personal evolution (in other words, being the change we want to see in the world) is exactly where “the rubber meets the road” of planetary evolution and by polishing-up our own energy field until it sparkles, giving it the springclean and makeover it deserves, we walk that talk in the most remarkable and instantly realisable way.