The two biggest projects of my working year have both fizzled out like damp fireworks this month and yet I’m fine…more than fine. Both of these work-related things were big news, if you’d asked me a couple of months ago yet both, for no fault of mine, came to naught. When one fizzled out it was “oh” but now two – its almost funny.
I find myself surprised at my own nonchalance and also amused at what this says about how I have evolved as a soul in human form this last year or so. What once might have defined me now only makes me feel all the more curious, more alert, more excited. I find myself wondering “what does the universe have in store for me now” and am simply prepared to wait and see.
In the meantime, I am enjoying the void – really enjoying it; what I have achieved in just a few weeks of pulling back and recalibration within that void of all potential is immeasurable, both on a practical and deeply personal level. Part of me was holding out to share this post after a meeting I have set up that could turn into my next best opportunity…but that was to miss the point entirely. No longer defined by what is happening to me, I feel much stronger resonance with the focal point of just being rather than doing and the fact that I feel so very comfortable there. Like a universe in the moment before the birth of another star (just as two more recently extinguish in the void) I am poised without waiting, without defining, without…anything. From that space, unexpected newness is already birthing and I look forward to helping it into form at a pace that feels just right to me. I am feeling so ridiculously joyful, optimistic, excited without apparent reason and, well, its so hard to put it into words…
As Matt Kahn would say, “Whatever arises, love that”.
Superb artwork, included with much gratitude, by Maori Sakai on Tumblr