Awakening flu

I recently opened a post by stating that I avoid talking about the health challenges that run along the same path as what is, otherwise, the great and thrilling adventure of taking an evolutionary leap in one generation  – and while I noticed how I couched that as some sort of apology, I was prepared to leave the analysis of ‘why that was’ right there. That is, until I tripped upon a fellow writer – one who writes for several magazines including the Huffington Post – who expressed pretty much the same reticence and for the same reasons that are lurking there inside of me….which really made me sit up and take note. In fact, the very title of her article (full link below) hit a tender point in me that had me asking this question…

Why are those who are prepared to dive headlong into just about any subject, on such an expansive range of headings, still so very reticent to step into this territory; who put up the “keep off the grass” signs around the topic of how evolution affects the body? 

Lori Ann Lothian asks this question – her own way – in a blog post that speaks a whole lot of resonant sense about the connection between awakening and profound body symptoms, with enough cross over with my own observations on the subject for me to want to share it here…not just as a post of interest but as a ‘must read’ for anyone experiencing the same or similar.

I too have observed that what appears to be ‘the problem’ with my physical vehicle is that any intense flow of energy…and these appear to be getting stronger all the time…can provoke profound adjustment issues in a body not yet fully acclimatised.  The net result of this seems to be that as I feel ever-more in harmony with everything, more at-one, more at peace, more sparky and inspired and truly never more plugged in to the infinitely bigger picture and the flow of everything, my body only seems to be more prone to taking the knock of this in ways that range between extreme fatigue, incredibly intense pain, brain fog, loss of sensation or of memory, challenges articulating myself verbally and a variety of other symptoms that all have something to do with being, well, some sort of conduit for such vast amounts of electricity that my circuit board gets fried!

I too have referred to this process of awakening, many times, as a metamorphosis; the pretty-much overnight (on the bigger scale of things) transformation from ‘caterpillar’ to having a completely different operating system and ‘a pair of wings’ to unwrap from their packaging and learn how to use, without a manual. The strain all of this can put on the human body, as it seeks to rewire, recalibrate and upgrade (mid-flight), can feel like something akin to re-entry turbulence as the space shuttle comes into land. Good attention to what my body needs at any given time helps mitigate the effects of this and, yes, I have various long-running issues going on with my body…which, by and large, are steadily improving. However, the fact remains that they become very activated indeed when powerful influxes of energy flow through me!

My own experience…and increasing…this year has been of more and more ‘electrical’ symptoms that include tremors, persistent eye twitches, random electric stabbing pains, pins and needles and intense muscle spasms that have had me dreading the onset of MS. I’ve long suspected that Fibromyalgia and myofascial issues are the natural territory of those going through accelerated evolution but, lately, I’ve noticed increasing references amongst such people to Bell’s Palsy (three people that I’ve heard of lately) and MS, also particularly severe migraines that ebb and flow with the solar flares and other cosmic triggers (yes, I get those too); even strokes seem to crop up more-often-than-not in enlightenment circles so that I receive constant surprises from those who tell me they have had a brush with such a thing. Lori Ann’s article observes these very same trends. To even hear a descriptor such as “the toll of post-awakening energies on the body” in such a sensible and well-balanced article feels like the nod I was awaiting for to admit that, yes, I know this territory well.

What I love about the strident and ‘say it like it is’ pace of this post is that I no longer feel like this is something too weird (or ‘negative’) to talk about in spiritual circles or in public; rather, that its a de facto description of part of the process that is as ‘there’ and ‘happening’ as any of the others that are more widely talked about as humanity takes this giant leap forwards in its evolutionary process.  In this new spotlight of clarity, I’m left feeling like I can say “why are we so surprised?” rather than feeling vaguely ashamed of my struggling body as though its apparent shortcomings are a sign that I’m doing something wrong. Looking at it ‘rationally’ for a moment (which is, after all, the domain of the very ‘left side of the brain’ that is presenting with this adjustment ‘disorder’ – though I prefer to regard it as more akin to a time lag), its hardly surprising that the sheer intensity of some of the experiences I am now party to, which include energy influxes that I can describe just as vividly as I could describe today’s weather, should shake and temporarily distort a body that is somewhat stuck in its old patterns; in fact it would be surprising if this were not the case. The cumulative effect of the radical shift of perception I have undergone – about absolutely EVERYTHING – this past three years or so could be classified as more profound than just about every commonplace trauma you could come up with rolled into one, and that’s a whole lot for the logical mind to chew on in one almighty go!

The significance of the role played by ‘left brain’ in the magnitude of this adjustment phase, as it presents to some individuals, has been long acknowledged by me – confident, as I am, that if my right brain was at liberty to run the whole show, the turbulence to my body would be significantly lessened or, most likely, gone altogether. Its a balance I’ve worked on addressing – believe me – yet the reality remains that, while I remain in physical form, there must surely be an attempt at synergy between the two ‘sides’, even if the left brain is required to redefine its role somewhat. If I were to retire the left brain entirely, I would be left sitting in the corner uttering “bibble” to myself while my inner landscape took me off somewhere else entirely. Somewhere in this process, I need to get the hang of holding both reins in balance, once again, so that I can drive this suped-up vehicle forwards along its new path.

The reference, in this article, to brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor – whose life-experience of having a stoke that disengaged most of her left brain….and triggered enlightenment – had the effect of allowing me to experience another swooping body-sigh due to landing in extremely good, and respected, company. (It also reminded me I have yet to finish reading her book ‘My Stroke of Insight‘, which is one of those I put down, half-read, about a year ago; another awakening ‘symptom’ of mine being a new lack of sticking power when it comes to completing books.)

The strength of my enthusiasm for this article tells me much about the potency of the emotion I have been carrying around, for the longest time, about ‘what is happening to me’ and a sort-of malevolence hanging around the idea of admitting to it; asking, why do the very real circumstances of my health fill me with such dread when it comes to talking about them in public?  Especially when I no longer label them as ‘bad’ but, rather, as an essential part of the process towards a new state that I embrace fully, without reservation.

More than that, I have long suspected that the body is the very portal through which I am entering the territory; that is, by working through the ‘challenges’ it is presenting to me at this time, I get to process myself to a fuller understanding of how and why this awakening will and must take place through the physical vehicle and is not achieved through attaining some abstract ‘higher state’ that involves exiting the body to travel off somewhere else that is, so often, depicted as ‘better than’ the human physical experience. Interpreted like that, I find I am able to step out of fear – whatever my body is presenting me with right now – and dive into the current of what feels exciting and uplifting beyond anything I have ever experienced, just knowing – by measure of my own body – that monumental changes are afoot.

Lori Ann captures this in her own round-up question “Why are we not ready to hear this? And why do we shut down, diminish, hide or crucify those who tell us the body is not incidental in awakening; that the body is the gateway itself?”

The very fact of this article – this question – encourages me that we are more ready than we were to hear this, and say it, out here in mainstream…which can only help others going through similar experiences to steer out of fear or despair and into the flow of excitement of it all, because that’s where I choose to be. Like a flu on the first week back at school, this undeniably intense phase is like an adjustment flu, on a grand scale – and the more we talk about it openly, allow it and dissolve all the fear surrounding it, the easier it will get.

Rather than paraphrase the article that ‘set me off’ today any further, I will hand you over to it – and recommend it strongly – as it really is worth the read.


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Featured photo Bryce Bradford

About Helen White

Helen White is a professional artist and published writer with two primary blogs to her name. Her themes pivot around health and wellbeing, expanded consciousness and ways of noticing how life is a constant dance between the deeply subjective and the collective-universal, all of which she explores with a daily hunger to get to know herself better. A lifetime of "feeling outside" of mainstream...slowly emerging as Asperger's Syndrome, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome plus a complex of co-morbid health challenges, being a confirmed Highly Sensitive Person and an INFJ personality type, not to mention born under an out of bounds moon (need I go on) fed into the creation of Living Whole; a self-exploratory blog fed by a wide angle lens tilted at "health and wellness" topics. Meanwhile, Spinning the Light is a free-for-all covering a multitude of playful and positive subjects about life in the broadest sense...written with a no-holds-barred approach. Needless to say, their subjects cross over quite often.
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