Today, I finally lifted the lid – in other words, I got back to my paints! I’d been driving myself bananas by putting it off so long but it also felt so auspicious after such a long break that I’d begun to feel a bit anxious, as though I’d have forgotten how to use a brush. It took the best part of the day to get other ‘important’ things done (or was I just making excuses…) and do all the necessary prep, including priming the canvas and deciding what to paint…But once I’d made that first mark of white against black gesso, that same old indescribable feeling – something like warm syrup in the chest area… or the first heart-pound of love… or an electric thrill of excitement… or sheer overwhelming joy… (but basically far too hard to pin down in words) began to take me over and I was all smiles again, wondering just what had taken me so long!
And like a perfectly-timed mirror of what was going on with me, the low January sun suddenly appeared in the nook between two buildings and lit up the room with the most amazing amber light, casting rainbow-reflections around the room off the sides of the mirror over the fireplace and silver-lining the gargantuan cloud outside the window. The few minutes of incredible radiance pouring over the newly-started canvas felt like the most perfect sign that harmony was fully restored now that I have a brush back in my hand.
Excited to continue tomorrow…
